Yes, the Beast has been reawakened after a long winter's nap. Apologies to all our fans for the lack of action, but sometimes the fates conspire against you all at the same time, and you have to just grin and bear it. This week has been especially rough on your favorite reporter. (that's me, in case you're wondering!) I managed to burn off my taste buds by eating some raw rhubarb. (I'm absolutely serious) For the past few days, everything tastes like cardboard. For a man who enjoys the taste of food more than life itself, that's a pretty nasty affliction to have to deal with. But, I guess on the bright side, it's keeping me from spending a load of money on takeout food, so maybe it's a good thing afterall. (see, I can be positive when I want)

Well, the world of wrestling has been chugging along, despite the Beast's hibernation. Let's take a look at FHW, where I've been spending most of my time. As you may or may not know, the LWA has been given the authority to sanction their own matches on FHW TV. And, as a fringe benefit for FHW fans, they also get to see myself and Jim Browski providing commentary for said matches. Unfortunately, Ken Holbrook, our boss, has been too busy bitching and moaning to sanction any LWA matches lately. Now, I get paid whether I appear on TV or not, but it's the fans that I'm worried about. Without their Johnny Gallivan fix, I fear they might turn to a life of crime. Waitaminute, this is FHW fans I'm talking about, so they probably already spend a good deal of their free time breaking the law. So, just what is the status of the LWA Invasion? (at this point, I don't even know if it still constitutes a capital "I") Well, it will come as no surprise to anyone that Johnny Lassiter - the man who owns all the LWA copyrights and properties - is not impressed with the LWA's reaction thus far. In fact, this reporter has overheard several heated conversations between Holbrook and the "real boss" that would confirm that all isn't well in the garden of eden.

Now, if I can be obliged to trash my boss for a second, (and who doesn't love to do that, huh?) Ken Holbrook doesn't appear too concerned about the apparent failure of the invasion. Holbrook seems too busy with his own Machiavellian constructs. (it's called a dictionary, kids) But anyone who knows our man Ken, knows that he can be a dangerous man when backed into a corner. So, if Lassiter is pressuring Holbrook to deliver, then the "Jester" might just snap. I just hope I'm not in his line of sight when he goes off.

Several fans have asked me just what this big secret is that Ken Holbrook seems to hold over our misguided madman, "Bad News" Leroy Brown. Well, I've asked everyone who might know, and have come up with bupkus. The majority of Leroy's shames have been broadcast on live TV, so I can't imagine what he might be hiding. Oh, and for everyone who wanted to know just what "kinky stuff" Ken was talking about with regards to myself, well I haven't the foggiest idea. And, if Mr. Holbrook should decide to make up stuff about everyone's favorite reporter (like, for instance, some crap about a leather fetish), then I shall have to turn the matter over to my attorney. Enough said about that.

Lately, I've been spending some more time watching XGWO's product, and am constantly being impressed. Lee Todd is cranking out wins, but he seems to be held back by the front office. Not taking anything away from Avalanch or Trent Hunter, but Lee has been racking up the wins without a world title shot. But, for all the Todd fans out there, take heart, because the F'n' one (or is that Chosen one?) has finally become the #1 contender for the XGWO Intercontinental title. So, when the "Unholy Gauntlet" comes around, hopefully we'll be seeing some gold around the British bad boy's waist.

In case you haven't heard, we at The Beast are undergoing some pretty major changes right now. Several of our affiliates have bit the dust, which is always a shame. The CWF and KWA had a great product, but in this business, it's incredibly difficult for a fed to stay afloat for any extended period of time. That's just another reason to take your hat off to FHW, whose management somehow manages to stay in business through just about everything. But, as we say goodbye to two great feds, we also say hello to "Dominant Wrestling On-line", our newest affiliate. The best thing about the DWO, is that it's got a ton of fresh faces. Historically, there has been a lot of crossover (wrestler-wise) with our affiliates, but DWO has a lot of wrestlers who I have never seen in action before. As a fan of wrestling in it's purest sense, I think that's a great thing. The more talent you see in action, the better appreciation you get for the sport. (yes, Mr. Mack-Man, it's still a sport)

So, in closing, 2002 is looking pretty good for us in the wrestling business, especially those of us here at The Beast. If you're an old fan of our wrestling magazine, then welcome back. And, if you're a new fan looking in, well enjoy your stay, and don't feed the animals. That's it for me. Until next time, keep your laces tight, and your powder dry.